Hello, I know its been a while. I know many of you are interested in Disciplship for Developement the work my collages are currently doing in Rwanda and what I am returning to join in. Here are so new videos of the ministry! They are awesome...the heart of empowering people for the Kingdom of God! Hope you love them! Check out the link below to Brad and Chelsea's Blog to view them.
New D4D videos link
Monday, April 16, 2012
Friday, January 27, 2012
Uncovering the Masterpiece...
Sometimes I think of this world and all God is doing in it as a masterpiece. This summer in Italy I got to travel and see so many maginficent works. My best friend Jess was an Art major and it was like having our very own class as we toured those famous halls. Most of the works we looked at to me had this paradoxical theme. There was obviously beauty, grace and imagination. But in the same breath the evidence of struggle, difficulties, hard labor, and maybe even heart break was intertwined into these peaces. This became even more evident to me as we heard about the artist life. The Sistine Chapel was breath taking. It was even more breath taking when you hear how difficult both socially and physically it was for Michelangelo. I feel like this year I am starting to really value this idea of masterpiece. Many of you know of my battle with parasites and health this year. Through this experience I feel like God is restoring my faith. It has been a hard year of having to constantly rely on the Lord and not always see the results in the timing I expect. It has been a year of sickness, moving, losing, gaining, waiting, stress and ...transition. I think there have definitely been points of doubt and struggle. Points where I wasn't sure if the Lord cared or wanted to help me along the way. Points where I was just praying for the faith to believe in getting better or that relief would come. There were also many points of triumhmp and peace to keep me going. He has always proven faithful in the past. So, I was holding on even when it was hard. I feel like this was a time of expectation. I time of waiting for the artist to reveal his work. In so many ways I kind of felt like God's master plan for me, his masterpiece, was a little hidden. Other times it felt like it was covered with burlap sack and not even close to being ready to mount on the wall.
As I look back over this sickness and this transition year... I see the Lord. I now can see him every step of the way even when I wasn't paying attention. I am now finally seeing why getting sick has had its benefits. I can see how it has kept me humble and clinging to him. I can see how it has showed me that all things are possible in his timing. I have learned so much about myself that I don't know if without this situation I would understand. This experience is teaching me habits that I hope will make me a healthier person and missionary. It has felt like an unveiling to some extent. Not necessarily that everything is clear or that I understand it all. But I definitely feel like I got a glimpse of what he is doing.
Once again the Lord reminds me that he is always in control. He is always working all things for our good. He has big plans for our abundant life. He is letting me finally see his hard work.However, life in the center of his will is stressful and difficult. Anyone that tells you it isn't...I thin is wrong. But he helps us carry these burdens with wisdom and peace. He is with us. He has good gifts to give his children today as well. Even if they don't always look like what we think. I think this life he is calling us to seems to be more paradoxical to me all the time. He has called us to abundant life but sometimes there is struggle to get to the beauty of this world. It isn't that it wasn't there all along we just have to wait sometimes to discover it. This life with Him is always worth. I thank him that sometimes he gives us glimpse of his masterpiece. It keeps us all going in those time where all we see is the dull, dirt, and grime on the burlap sack, this world. Praise him that as we come to know him more and more he is pealing back the sack and revealing his cherished work.
(forgive my cheese analogy)
Molly
Monday, December 5, 2011
Jars of Clay
I have been feeling very much like a Jar of Clay lately. Jars of Clay is a band most of you have heard of. This phrase actually comes out of 2 Corinthians 4:7.
"However, we possess this precious treasure [the divine Light of the Gospel] in [frail, human] vessels of earth [Jars of clay], that the grandeur and exceeding greatness of the power may be shown to be from God and not from ourselves."
I think that sometimes whether I am conscious of it or not I begin to think I have it all together. I am a person that normally can handle a full steam ahead schedule and the stress that goes with it. I am aware of my need and my reliance on the Lord. But being a capable person sometimes allows for me to forget how much I need the Lord in day to day life.
Lately between sickness, moving across the world and just the workings of life I am struggling. Struggling to feel well, not be anxious, find time to rest, be patient, believe in the Lord's promises, and more. Struggling to keep it together in a way I haven't really experienced before. At first I started thinking I was crazy but I coming to realize more and more that it just a tuff time wtih layers of struggle. I live in a fallen body and I live in a fallen world.
This time has been a good reminder for me that I don't have it all together, I am a broken jar and that is ok. It's ok because I am called to give glory to God and not myself. That it isn't about me but him. That he is the King of all and in control. Also, it is ok because being in the middle of God's will is a stressful place. Jesus and Paul were in the middle of God's will and they struggled, they were stressed, it wasn't always peaceful or even easy. God always sent them relief or encouragement but it wasn't always right way. I am really not the only one who struggles. It is ok because I am his child and in the process of being perfected. He doesn't expect that of me today. Above all during this time I have realized, maybe even for the first time, that the weaknesses in me (that I am so ashamed of) are in fact the very weakness that God uses to show the world himself. You know these things as a Christian and missionary. You are reminded often of how much you have no control of, how much you need God and his wisdom. But I think this time has been a great reminder for me of the truth of these verses. Hopefully a permanent reminder for me because apart from him we can do nothing.
Praise God for being bigger than us. Praise the Lord that he is near. Praise the Lord that he loves and cherish his broken jars of clay. May all he does in each of us be for His Glory, His fame and His Kingdom!
"However, we possess this precious treasure [the divine Light of the Gospel] in [frail, human] vessels of earth [Jars of clay], that the grandeur and exceeding greatness of the power may be shown to be from God and not from ourselves."
I think that sometimes whether I am conscious of it or not I begin to think I have it all together. I am a person that normally can handle a full steam ahead schedule and the stress that goes with it. I am aware of my need and my reliance on the Lord. But being a capable person sometimes allows for me to forget how much I need the Lord in day to day life.
Lately between sickness, moving across the world and just the workings of life I am struggling. Struggling to feel well, not be anxious, find time to rest, be patient, believe in the Lord's promises, and more. Struggling to keep it together in a way I haven't really experienced before. At first I started thinking I was crazy but I coming to realize more and more that it just a tuff time wtih layers of struggle. I live in a fallen body and I live in a fallen world.
This time has been a good reminder for me that I don't have it all together, I am a broken jar and that is ok. It's ok because I am called to give glory to God and not myself. That it isn't about me but him. That he is the King of all and in control. Also, it is ok because being in the middle of God's will is a stressful place. Jesus and Paul were in the middle of God's will and they struggled, they were stressed, it wasn't always peaceful or even easy. God always sent them relief or encouragement but it wasn't always right way. I am really not the only one who struggles. It is ok because I am his child and in the process of being perfected. He doesn't expect that of me today. Above all during this time I have realized, maybe even for the first time, that the weaknesses in me (that I am so ashamed of) are in fact the very weakness that God uses to show the world himself. You know these things as a Christian and missionary. You are reminded often of how much you have no control of, how much you need God and his wisdom. But I think this time has been a great reminder for me of the truth of these verses. Hopefully a permanent reminder for me because apart from him we can do nothing.
Praise God for being bigger than us. Praise the Lord that he is near. Praise the Lord that he loves and cherish his broken jars of clay. May all he does in each of us be for His Glory, His fame and His Kingdom!
Monday, October 17, 2011
Fall into the Season....
Tis the season in my life for many things...
1- Reconnecting.
With America, with newlyweds and upcoming neputials, with iOS 5, with pinterest and groupon, with Mexican food and Dr. Pepper, with shopping at Kale's side, with supporters near/far and new/old, with hometown football games and the fighting Texas Aggies, with catching up over coffee with Mel, with all the new additions like baby Lake, Aribella, baby boy Ratcliff and Carter, with the giggles, TBall games and the homework of my nephews, with the late night chats with my mom, with a healthier body and working out and the with the sweet reassurance of the Lord all around all the time...no matter what continent or season I am in.
2- Reflecting.
Looking back...Seeing where God has brought from, appreciating my roots and my family. Enjoying South Texas life and seeing how much it is apart of who I am. Thinking back over the last two years in Rwanda and all that God has done. That I made it and experienced more than I could hope for. Praising the Lord for all he has done and the people in my life he has placed behind, beside and before me. How all of this has shaped and molded my current moments and praying expectantly for all that is ahead. Thank you Lord.
3- Experincing the Moment
I am enjoying the Fall wind, clouds and smells that I have missed so much over the last years. Something about the the way the wind blows reminds me that life isn't the same for long, things are changing, and will always be. I miss Rwanda and my life that is going on without me there. But Time away from Rwanda is short and when I miss it I just try to remember that my time in the US is short too. So I take a deeper look at the rosy red cheeks running over my foot (thank you Jaxon's...I love you boy!). I breathe deeper into the spice latte and the smell of my sweet sister. For some it might be a somber time but for me Fall has always been so exciting. The rustling leaves and the changing weather have their way of showing me that the Lord is here and hope is always just around the corner. So don't fret over today....Live it up!
Every season isn't this sweet. So, for now I am just sitting back and enjoying the ride.
1- Reconnecting.
With America, with newlyweds and upcoming neputials, with iOS 5, with pinterest and groupon, with Mexican food and Dr. Pepper, with shopping at Kale's side, with supporters near/far and new/old, with hometown football games and the fighting Texas Aggies, with catching up over coffee with Mel, with all the new additions like baby Lake, Aribella, baby boy Ratcliff and Carter, with the giggles, TBall games and the homework of my nephews, with the late night chats with my mom, with a healthier body and working out and the with the sweet reassurance of the Lord all around all the time...no matter what continent or season I am in.
2- Reflecting.
Looking back...Seeing where God has brought from, appreciating my roots and my family. Enjoying South Texas life and seeing how much it is apart of who I am. Thinking back over the last two years in Rwanda and all that God has done. That I made it and experienced more than I could hope for. Praising the Lord for all he has done and the people in my life he has placed behind, beside and before me. How all of this has shaped and molded my current moments and praying expectantly for all that is ahead. Thank you Lord.
3- Experincing the Moment
I am enjoying the Fall wind, clouds and smells that I have missed so much over the last years. Something about the the way the wind blows reminds me that life isn't the same for long, things are changing, and will always be. I miss Rwanda and my life that is going on without me there. But Time away from Rwanda is short and when I miss it I just try to remember that my time in the US is short too. So I take a deeper look at the rosy red cheeks running over my foot (thank you Jaxon's...I love you boy!). I breathe deeper into the spice latte and the smell of my sweet sister. For some it might be a somber time but for me Fall has always been so exciting. The rustling leaves and the changing weather have their way of showing me that the Lord is here and hope is always just around the corner. So don't fret over today....Live it up!
Every season isn't this sweet. So, for now I am just sitting back and enjoying the ride.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
So a chapter closes...
I have now been in Rwanda for almost two years. It is hard to believe and yet if feels like I just arrived yesterday. It has been hard work and at times has felt like a losing battle but I can honestly say that God has given me a life here. I have a few great friends. I have learned a ton about culture and what to do and not do (I will always have more to learn). I have learned all the best restaurants and good places to buy things. I have even learned to drive the crazy streets of Kigali without having a heart attack. I can even tell you where to get the best medical care. I have learned that as hard as it is to be away from my family and friends (and yes I will admit it Mexican Food and Dr. Pepper) God is here in Rwanda. He has been since the dawn of time and He will continue to be.
This is sometimes hard to remember, when you see the hardships around you. The poverty, the lies, the corruption, the secrets, the stories, and the history of this place can be daunting. It is also hard when I miss important events at home or just want my mom when I am sick. However, He is the life giver and I despite all of that He is at work in the lives and hearts of all of us. I have found Him many times in this distant land. He is in the faces of children. He is there in the choirs of our churches. He is in the green and lush hills draped around us. He is in the tune of blessing of our workers. He is in the "ah-ha!" moments of my students. He is there in the laughter caused by my language mistakes. He is there even when I feel hopeless. He is there even when I feel alone. He is there even in the deepest moments of loss. He is there in the stories of redemption. He is there in the knowledge of our Rwandan leadership staff. He is there in the giggles of our neighbor's chubby baby. The one thing that is more beautiful than all of this is that He is not just here. He is in the business of bringing new life. He is restoring homes, bringing people out of poverty and teaching us all how to be the glorious people He made us to be.
So, what have I learned over the past two years?
-Our God is bigger than even the biggest problems (poverty, war, genocide)
-I can learn language even if it takes me many many years (What a battle)
-I can be content in all circumstances with the grace and strength of the Holy Spirit
-I am loved (By people at home, by people here, by Our King)
-When we work together as the body of Christ there is little we cannot accomplish (I have an amazing team)
-Grace for ourselves, our neighbors, our loved ones is a huge gift
-I am weird and that is ok! (I know you all already knew that but in Rwanda you have to just find peace with it)
-I am human and I have human emotions. (Culture shock, language learning, loneliness, homesickness, illness, and death are not above me...they are all difficult)
-Laughter and sleep are refreshing to the soul
-Doing what calls you to do no mater how difficult is worth it
-Living in community is difficult and rewarding
-God is faithful
-He is with us
There are so many more things I have learned, which only shows me how much more there is to learn. As this chapter of life closes I am so grateful for it. I came to Rwanda to learn first hand about missions, to aid God's Kingdom and to maybe get a glimpse of what's next. I praise the Father for he allowed me to do all three. I have learned so much about missions and have seen so much of it first hand. I have been exposed and been offered the gauntlet of jobs and opportunities. I have seen things that hurt and other things that help tremendously. I have even been able to take classes that aid this training. Also, He has used me here to love and encourage and prepare missionary children. This year he has used me to love and equip Rwandan school teachers. Two jobs with incredible blessing. Finally, he has given me at least a taste of the future. Last year he began to call me back to Rwanda and to the ministry of holistic development. I was recently approved and will return in 1 year to learn language and join our team long term. Our God is faithful. Thank you Lord. This chapter maybe closing but the new one is just beginning.
Our God gives us Hope and a future. Stay tuned to here about my adventures in the states as I work my way back to Rwanda. A place that I can honestly begin to call home.
This is sometimes hard to remember, when you see the hardships around you. The poverty, the lies, the corruption, the secrets, the stories, and the history of this place can be daunting. It is also hard when I miss important events at home or just want my mom when I am sick. However, He is the life giver and I despite all of that He is at work in the lives and hearts of all of us. I have found Him many times in this distant land. He is in the faces of children. He is there in the choirs of our churches. He is in the green and lush hills draped around us. He is in the tune of blessing of our workers. He is in the "ah-ha!" moments of my students. He is there in the laughter caused by my language mistakes. He is there even when I feel hopeless. He is there even when I feel alone. He is there even in the deepest moments of loss. He is there in the stories of redemption. He is there in the knowledge of our Rwandan leadership staff. He is there in the giggles of our neighbor's chubby baby. The one thing that is more beautiful than all of this is that He is not just here. He is in the business of bringing new life. He is restoring homes, bringing people out of poverty and teaching us all how to be the glorious people He made us to be.
So, what have I learned over the past two years?
-Our God is bigger than even the biggest problems (poverty, war, genocide)
-I can learn language even if it takes me many many years (What a battle)
-I can be content in all circumstances with the grace and strength of the Holy Spirit
-I am loved (By people at home, by people here, by Our King)
-When we work together as the body of Christ there is little we cannot accomplish (I have an amazing team)
-Grace for ourselves, our neighbors, our loved ones is a huge gift
-I am weird and that is ok! (I know you all already knew that but in Rwanda you have to just find peace with it)
-I am human and I have human emotions. (Culture shock, language learning, loneliness, homesickness, illness, and death are not above me...they are all difficult)
-Laughter and sleep are refreshing to the soul
-Doing what calls you to do no mater how difficult is worth it
-Living in community is difficult and rewarding
-God is faithful
-He is with us
There are so many more things I have learned, which only shows me how much more there is to learn. As this chapter of life closes I am so grateful for it. I came to Rwanda to learn first hand about missions, to aid God's Kingdom and to maybe get a glimpse of what's next. I praise the Father for he allowed me to do all three. I have learned so much about missions and have seen so much of it first hand. I have been exposed and been offered the gauntlet of jobs and opportunities. I have seen things that hurt and other things that help tremendously. I have even been able to take classes that aid this training. Also, He has used me here to love and encourage and prepare missionary children. This year he has used me to love and equip Rwandan school teachers. Two jobs with incredible blessing. Finally, he has given me at least a taste of the future. Last year he began to call me back to Rwanda and to the ministry of holistic development. I was recently approved and will return in 1 year to learn language and join our team long term. Our God is faithful. Thank you Lord. This chapter maybe closing but the new one is just beginning.
Our God gives us Hope and a future. Stay tuned to here about my adventures in the states as I work my way back to Rwanda. A place that I can honestly begin to call home.
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Chelsea's Story of Hope
My colleague and friend Chelsea wrote a great blog post about hope! It was something I needed to hear and maybe you do too. Check it out http://bradchelseacarpenter.blogspot.com/2011/05/floating-lanterns.html
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Finding Cooper
My dear friend Jess has been helping a family for the last year or so adopt a little boy here in Rwanda. On Sunday they got to meet him for the first time! I got to be there. It was incredible. I met the family at the airport and traveled with them to the orphanage. The exicitment in the car was invigorating. The Allen family has 3 three children already and are thrilled to bring this little guy into their home. This family has been waiting for 2 1/2 years and been praying for over 500 days for this little one. When we arrived at the orphanage their son Mario (who they are renaming Cooper) came walking up the steps. It was breath taking to watch him embrace his new family for the first time. There was not a dry eye around. The joy in that room was overflowing and overwhelming. I was personally overwhelmed by the picture of that kind of selfless love. It reminded me of the same kind of love God gives us and the way he adopted me into his family. I was especially reminded of God's faithfulness and amazed by the Allen's obedience.They spent the next hour enjoying him and the next several days making it official. To read more and see pictures check out Jennie Allen's blog. http://jennieallen.com/blog/
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